jamie and eric-25-a startlingly painful discovery

The Masters’ building had a small cafeteria off the main lobby. Jamie wasn’t sure how much food they actually served, but the small sitting area seemed to always be empty. Or almost empty. Still it was nice. The seating area was broken into cushioned booths. Calm music was soft enough for conversation but eased the tension of talking in a silent room. It didn’t help the two boys that entered the room and grabbed their plastic trays.
Eric led Jamie to a booth in the back of the seating area. As usual Eric had gotten a large lunch. He never really had the appetite to eat a large breakfast, and after hard work in the hot sun Eric was ravishing by lunchtime. Today was two entrees: spaghetti and roasted chicken. Jamie only had half a sandwich. They sat opposite each other in the booth and Eric immediately began stuffing his face. Jamie was quiet and still across the booth, composing himself. Eric tried to ignore him, just enjoy his lunch. Jamie exhaled audibly and Eric bristled.
“I..” Jamie began. Eric continued eating. “We have the test today.” Jamie began again. Eric grunted affirmatively. “Right now we would register as having no bond.”
Startled Eric swallowed prematurely partially choking on his bite. After a generous gulp of water he demanded, “what?!”
“You know that the incident broke our bond.” Jamie stated simply.
“Yeah,” Eric thought for a second. Eric felt a little stupid. It wasn’t that he had really thought that they were strongly bonded, or bonded at all, he just hadn’t thought about it. Still everyone talked about them like they were bonded and Eric just accepted it as truth. “But why do a test then?”
Jamie eyes fell again. Eric waited for him to talk again, having momentarily forgotten about his food. Jamie tucked a few stray black hairs behind his ears. He looked uncomfortable. But when he did finally spoke his voice was authoritative, “I lied. Being an expert on the nature of bonds I was able to bluff alternative explanations for the obvious symptoms. Further they believed me because of my credentials, and because of my assumed investment in reestablishing a healthy bond.” Eric was a little taken aback. It sounded so premeditated. Hostile. “Fortunately it’s relatively easy to reconnect.”
And this really took Eric back. What was Jamie covering his tracks now. Did he think that Eric would just take it. “Why should I go along with your lies?” Eric demanded angrily.
Jamie shut his mouth. His face turning pale. He looked a little like Eric had just punched him in the gut. Eric slowly wound spaghetti around his fork. Jamie deserved it.
Jamie remained still, looking into his lap. Eric continued eating. Jamie’s coy silence only fueled Eric’s anger. Eric knew his was useless, but if someone was going to use him as a tool he at least deserved to know about it. He watched Jamie out of the corner of his vision. His lips were moving like he was talking to himself. Finally he spoke.
“Eric I’m not going to give you a chose.” He reached across the table to touch Eric’s hand as he said it. Almost a gesture of comfort, but Jamie’s hand was icy hot. Sending piercing pain where it touched Eric’s hand.
Jamie held Eric’s hand firmly, determinedly, until Eric yanked free. The pain didn’t stop. It spread and deepened.
Jamie cradled his hand, his face showing pain, as he got up and left. Eric couldn’t have stopped him if he wanted. The pain was consuming. It made his vision hazy. His stomach queasy. His body feel weak and shaky. The pain was in his bones and his blood. He timidly drank some water, hoping to ease the pain. Eric’s senses registered the weight and feel of the glass the way he would dream about drinking water. He had to direct the glass to the lips with his vision.
Eric abandoned the cup. The water hadn’t helped. Hadn’t registered. The pain was beyond physical. His soul was on fire. Eric tucked into himself and closed his eyes, surrendering to the pain. No one could see him and no one would look for him. He would just wait the pain out. And as the sensations settled in his mind became numb, time became numb.
And then something strange happened. Eric remembered back to when he first met Jamie. The memory replayed itself drawing him in. He relived that first moment when…

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